If you were to see the household I was raised in, you certainly would not have guessed that I’d grow up to become an expert on how to fuck. If anything, you’d of said, “nope, that guy’s more likely to grow up to become a 40-year-old virgin!” I grew up in middle-class suburbia. The family philosophy on sex was outright strange. We were allowed to watch movies & TV shows with violence & mayhem, but the moment a basic Hollywood love scene would appear on the screen, my parents would freak the fuck out and cover my eyes or turn off the TV. I’m not talking Deep Throat, Facial Abuse, or Debbie Does Dallas. I’m talking True Lies, for example, with Arnold Schwarzenegger.
The killings & blood & violence were no issue to my parents whatsoever. But when Jamie Lee Curtis starts to do a striptease (not even nude, just down to bra and panties, for fuck sake), that’s when we immediately had to fast-forward the movie, or I had to look away. Among other weird beliefs & philosophies, I was taught that sex & nudity are horrendous, horrible things to be avoided, shunned and definitely not discussed, and ABSOLUTELY not to be partaken of or enjoyed.
I was discouraged from having any girls over and had to keep my bedroom door open on the one or two occasions when an exception was made to that retarded, puritanical rule. Instead of my dad teaching me how to fuck girls like a regular dad, my parents taught me to be a sexual loser. No wonder I didn’t lose my virginity until I was 20 years old, although my friends were having sex much younger than that, and lots of it! It’s also no wonder that I ultimately popped out in the exact opposite direction that my parents tried to force me into.
It happens all the time, as you might already know. In addition to my work mentoring men on how to get laid, I’ve also worked as a professional talent manager in the porn industry for the past 17 years. Over the years, we’ve seen numerous pastors’ daughters, Mormon brides (yes, multiple ones, unrelated instances), etc. sign up to get fucked on camera.
When a natural human drive/interest, particularly the sexual one, is unduly suppressed in humans (especially in developing children & teens), most of the time you’re going to end up with a nymphomaniac or a horndog like myself. It’s just how nature works. Like the infamous line from Jurassic Park, “Life finds a way.“
Believe it or not, that cute little white kid that wasn’t allowed to watch an aging woman in a bra and panties do a harmless (and pretty unappealing, IMHO) little dance for Arnold Schwarzenegger… that kid ended up self-teaching himself how to fuck, losing his virginity at 20-years-old and then going on to become Mike the PussyTester, fucking thousands of girls (and counting), both on & off camera.
I’m not William Wallace, but I am Mike the PussyTester, and I’ve learned a LOT about fucking and HOW to fuck over the years, and I’m still learning! Part of my job, my actual occupation, is having sexy girls do stripteases for me to size them up for suitability in the adult film industry. Another part of my job is actually fucking those same sexy girls, often leaving a juicy creampie in their pussies, and sometimes in their arseholes!
Being a sex fanatic, the pussy I get on camera isn’t even sufficient for me! I’ve also had to study & become an expert in the arts of game, pickup, dating & seduction. I’ve learned to supplement the amount of pussy I get from porn work with additional pussy the old-fashioned way, by approaching girls in public & occasionally on dating apps, taking them out on dates, and getting them back to my place to smash. I go into great detail on the process I’ve perfected in my How to Get Laid program.
When writing this, I have yet to reach 40 years of age. I will not be that 40-year-old virgin that my parents tried to mold me into. I’m grateful to have broken the curse of the strange, prudish, anti-sex shared psychotic disorder & doctrine that I was raised around & taught. I am proud to have smashed the pussies of literally thousands of women around the world, to date, both on & off camera.
I’ve been blessed to live & fuck many pussies in both western culture, in the United States & Mexico, and in eastern culture, in Thailand. Although I adore American & Mexican girls (and their vaginas), I strongly prefer the sexual mores & ideas of Thailand because, frankly, they are not as utterly retarded as those in America.
Western women frequently act like their pussies are made of gold, like they’re above or more important than men. To sum up their mental retardation pandemic in one sentence:
“Just like any other human being, women love to fuck, but Western women have been erroneously programmed to pretend/act like they don’t, and they do so to their own disadvantage and to the detriment of society.“
I’ve experienced this personally, with regards to dating & pickup, and also on a business level, working with professing aspiring pornstars over the past 17 years.
Just as I was writing this very thought, I got a call from a woke Gen Z’er who told me that she wants to become a pornstar, but she’s “not going to be having sex with anybody.” If that’s not mental retardation, then I don’t know what is! How the fuck do you expect to become a PORNstar without having sex with anyone? I understand that every generation thinks the next is a bunch of idiots, but that’s simply indefensible!
Modern Thai women, from my experience, are much more down to Earth and generally more respectful. When I’ve taken Thai girls out to eat or had them over to my condo, it’s always been under the mutual premise of, “hey, I’m attracted to you; you’re attracted to me… let’s get comfortable with each other and then let’s have some great sex, like normal fucking adults!” There’s much less game-playing, manipulation, posturing & overall bullshit to deal with when it comes to Thai girls.
The good news: My How to Get Laid program works very well on women worldwide: American girls, Thai girls, British girls, Mexican girls, black girls, white girls, and any girl you could imagine. I would tell you that it will unlock a wealth of information that “she doesn’t want you to know,” but that wouldn’t be true.
She wants you to know this information because she desperately wants to get fucked, and she needs a MAN that knows how to fuck and has the confidence & knowledge to get her panties to drop & her legs to spread. Become that MAN with my How to Get Laid program. Acquire the knowledge, and the confidence is guaranteed to follow right behind.
How to Fuck – Step One – Approach Actual Girls
Humanity has gone through many phases. There have been many cultures, religions, cultural norms, etc., over lands & time. Sexuality, dating, adult entertainment, etc., has always been viewed very differently depending on your country, what timeframe you’re talking about, etc. For example, think of the sexual ideas of the Puritans in the Massachusetts Bay Colony compared to modern-day spring breakers in Daytona Beach. Or how about the sexual values of visitors to Las Vegas “Sin City” compared to those of Muslim extremists in Iraq & Afghanistan? Or how about those of the ancient Greeks & Romans compared to modern-day orthodox Jews? And these are just variations from one group to the next. Once you begin considering the varying opinions and viewpoints of individuals, you’re getting into variations greater than there are grains of sand on the beach!
Regardless of your background or beliefs, nature dictates that it is generally the male’s responsibility in male/female relations to be the initiator in heterosexual relationships. Regardless of what misinformation woke culture has attempted to shove down your throat, a male is a human, duck, goose, swan, dog, horse, bull, gorilla, chimpanzee, camel, boar, stag, whale, dolphin, hyena, lion, tom cat, cheetah, marten, walrus, mink, bat, rat, kangaroo, anteater, turtle, crocodile, etc. that was born with a penis.
It is the male’s job to initiate and escalate the relationship (and the sex) and to know how to fuck. “Relationship” can mean a traditional marriage with a white picket fence, 2.5 kids and a dog, or it can mean a drunken one-night stand after a couple of drinks at the local nightclub, or anything in between.
Sure, you have the occasional, few-and-far-between one-offs where a girl will ask a guy out, instigate a relationship or fling, or even propose marriage to the guy, but that’s not how nature works. Just watch a few shows on National Geographic, and it’s plain to see that nature intends males (and not females) to be the dominant, more assertive party, the instigator of most sexual relations.
If you were born with a penis (i.e., if you’re a man) and you are not at the level of sexual success that you desire, and you’re sitting around at a coffee shop at your local mall (or, worse yet, in front of your water-cooled gaming rig at home), watching all of the pretty girls walking by and angrily wondering why none of them is approaching you to ask you out, this is the FIRST & MOST IMPORTANT CONCEPT that you MUST wrap your head around and accept:
It’s NOT THE GIRLS’ FUCKING JOB to approach you, to make the first move (or the second, or the third, or the fourth, etc.), to escalate the relationship, etc. NATURE DICTATES THAT IS YOUR JOB, AS THE MAN!
Yes, cold approaching hot girls can be extremely frightening for a beginner, a novice, or even an expert like myself. First & foremost, there is likely a fear of rejection. Yes, completely valid question… “what if she says no?“
My How to Get Laid masterclass will teach you how to re-program your mind to your FIRST pre-approach thought being the exact opposite… “What if she says YES? Is she a screamer? (I hope so!) Does she squirt? Does she have big, juicy labia? How big are her areolas? How wet is she going to get, merely by witnessing & feeling my confident energy as I approach her right now, like the king of the jungle?“
Secondly, there are likely to be witnesses. Whether that’s her friends, “innocent bystanders” (the bartender, the Target employee stocking the shelf, the random person standing next to her at the stoplight, etc.), what are they going to think?
Ultimately, if they aren’t paying your bills or fucking you, then their opinion is irrelevant. It might not be irrelevant to your ego, but in reality, it is.
Of course, I cover what to say on the approach in my How to Get Laid masterclass, but the words that come out of your mouth are incredibly unimportant compared to overcoming your fears and making your approach in the first place. If you allow fear to paralyze you from walking up to her & opening your mouth, then all of the fancy scripts & pickup lines in the world will be of zero benefit to you.
Most dating apps (including the paid ones) in Western countries are entirely useless, filled with fake profiles, and a waste of your time. To start getting pussy, you need to get used to approaching attractive girls in public places and then escalating the relationships from there.
How to Fuck – Step Two – Sexual Escalation
Sex is more important to me now than it was back when I was a horny, 20-year-old virgin, nearly two decades ago. After fucking thousands of girls since then, both on & off camera, I’ve become habituated to certain things. Her queefing as I plow the fuck out of her pussy is one of them. (Other fat cock guys that like to go hard can undoubtedly relate.) Escalation is another. Sexual escalation is now like second nature to me, even damn near boring at times.
Sexual escalation is the single most crucial skill to learn about how to fuck. We go into great detail on this topic and cover the most essential attitude to learn about how to fuck in my How to Get Laid masterclass. Google defines escalation as “a rapid increase; a rise.” Escalation, in modern sexual terms, is moving from/to the following waypoints:
- Target selected; strangers
- Approach, initiate contact
- Friendly acquaintances
- On a date
- First touch
- First kiss
- Move to a location appropriate (or not) for coitus (sex), unless you’re already there
- Additional foreplay
- Oral sex
- Vaginal penetration (Woo-hoo!)
- Full-on fucking until the male (and hopefully the girl) cums
- Wash, rinse, repeat waypoints 6 through 10
- (Optional) Become friends, fuck buddies, boyfriend/girlfriend, husband/wife, etc.
If you want to know how to fuck, it will help to keep these waypoints in the back of your mind and to know which waypoint you’re on and (even more importantly) which waypoint comes next.
Fear & insecurity is a bitch, one that must be tamed and put into subjection as the meddling, stupid twat that she is. For example, I can recall lying in bed with a girl that I’d already fucked that very night, petrified of what would happen if I started rubbing on her pussy and got rejected for trying to get another round of sex. These imagined fears were all in my head. I was a prisoner of my self-generated fears & thoughts.
Nowadays, that’s no longer a problem for me. I fuck her over and over until I’m good and ready to pass out because I understand that’s MY JOB as the man, to be the initiator, to be the dominant one. Once I wake up, I usually grab some coffee and fuck her some more!
Sure, I’ll occasionally have those nymphomaniac teenie-bopper (or even “MILF”) girls that will jump my bones when I’m just lying there in bed, trying to watch a movie, but that’s the exception to the rule. Women are wired to be more submissive, feminine beings, waiting for the prompting of the male to engage in sexual intercourse. This applies to the first sexual interaction between the two parties and most of them thereafter. It applies to human females, as well as to females in the animal kingdom.
Just this morning, I watched some birds in front of my home do an interesting mating dance in the air. One bird flew to a power line where a slightly smaller bird was chilling out. Little by little, he brought himself closer to the smaller bird. He walked sideways across the power line, first taking a big sideways step with his right foot and then dragging his body and left foot along. He was constantly progressing, but carefully. This is proper sexual escalation.
She turned her beak towards him and stared at him as he did some nodding/dance routine. As he got too close for comfort, the lady bird flew off, but not to run away as if she was attempting to escape an actual predator. She landed just a few feet away on the same power line. Once again, the male began to close the distance on her. She was amused and wanted to test the male’s confidence.
It looked to me like my little homie was excellently passing her test. I knew then that he must be one of my students in my How to Get Laid masterclass! Something tells me that these two lovebirds will soon form a little bird’s nest somewhere in the neighborhood.
I’ve become fascinated with the idea of “closing the distance” or shortening the amount of time it takes to get from Waypoint #1 (above) – Selecting a Target to Waypoint #10 – Vaginal Penetration, while maintaining complete consensuality & moral integrity. This is precisely what my How to Get Laid masterclass is all about.
You’re in Target, shopping. You look down an aisle and WAMO! Ka-bam! There she is… in a little schoolgirl skirt or short dress, maybe with some nice little stalkings or fishnets, showing off some amazingly soft, succulent cleavage, her perky tits pointing directly at the shelves like laser beams. No boyfriend in sight, but she looks like she’s BEGGING to get plowed (because she is). And if we’re being brutally honest, you DESPERATELY want to give her a good plowing, don’t you?
So how do we go from here to that glorious first moment when your mushroom tip slides past the entrance of her pussy? She moans with delight as she now physically FEELS your dominant, masculine energy pulsating inside of & throughout her body.
How do we get from one scenario to the other, and how do we minimize the time it takes to do so? I’ve given you a giant piece of the puzzle here. Just like navigating a ship, a plane or a car, you need to know where you are currently and what your destination is to develop a plan of attack. Learn how to fuck by moving from one waypoint to the next in my How to Get Laid training program.
How to Fuck – Step Three – Fuck Like a Pornstar
They say that women enjoy sex to the same extent that men do. Although I’ve been inside many a woman, I’ve never been a woman myself, so I can’t be sure if that’s true. What I do know is that women love to get plowed. White girls, black girls, Asians & Latinas, they all love to get penetrated by a throbbing hard cock and pounded down nice & hard.
It’ll be somewhere between Waypoint #2 – Approach, Initial Contact (see Step Two – Sexual Escalation, above) and Waypoint #8 – Additional Foreplay that she consciously decides, “you know what… I’m gonna fuck this guy.” My How to Get Laid masterclass will teach you how to increase the likelihood that she’ll make that decision in your favor and make it as close to Waypoint #1 as possible. You’ll also learn how to fuck by maintaining & increasing the sexual tension so that when Waypoint #7 – Move to a Location to Fuck is achieved, her pussy will be dripping wet and she’ll be unable to keep her hands off you.
Waypoints 8 & 9, Additional Foreplay & Oral Sex, are the bridge from physical intimacy to actual sex. Waypoint #10 – Vaginal Penetration, is where we pick up from here. At this point, she has fully surrendered her body to you. You are in control. This is the moment you’ve BOTH been waiting for… as Bruce Buffer always says, it’s the MAIN EVENT of the evening!
Instead of plowing right in, breathe, relax and savor the moment. There’s plenty of time ahead to fuck like wild dogs. Bite her neck. Kiss & bite her lips. Rub your fingers through her hair. Grab your erect cock by the shaft and caress her labia (vaginal lips) & clit with your mushroom tip, teasing her & reminding her who’s in control of the situation and of the timing as well.
Lap her pussy like a dog and swallow her juices. While she’s on her back, elevate her hips and ass and move your tongue from her pussy, across her perineum and directly into her asshole. Clean that motherfucker in a circular motion, letting her know that she’s not dealing with a little boy… she’s about to get railed & inseminated by a wild beast… a dirty, dominant, testosterone-filled beast.
Then stick your hard cock in her pussy. Look her directly in the eyes while you do so, not breaking eye contact for a second.
Learn how to fuck in a variety of sex positions. I cover all of them in my masterclass. My personal favorites are old-fashioned missionary & (as of recently) lotus. There’s no more intimate position than the lotus. You both get a great view of the penetration. I love staring directly into her eyes as I thrust into her. She sometimes looks away with shyness, and sometimes she’ll stare back into my eyes. It’s also a fantastic position to make out in while fucking, and there are several variations & angles to play with. Most girls like doggystyle the best. There’s also cowgirl & reverse cowgirl, and many others.
She is giving her body to you. That’s a very intimate thing. Let her know you’re attracted to her. Now is NOT the time to be reserved or coy. Let her know you’re the boss. Don’t be afraid to moan, talk dirty, whisper into her ear, and be yourself. There’s nothing hotter than a girl or guy yelling at the top of their lungs, “I’m cuming!” Be proud. Let the world know. You are a SEXUAL being; you are ALIVE and doing what SEXUAL beings do!
I don’t believe in abortion (including the “morning after”/”Plan B” pill), but I also never use condoms. I feel that it’s her responsibility to already be on birth control as a sexually-active adult female. I also believe that it’s my responsibility, as the man, to ask her if she’s on it and to abstain from cumming inside of her pussy if she isn’t. Both parties must step up as responsible parents in the event of an unplanned pregnancy and undergo regular STI screenings. That’s how upstanding, responsible adults do sex.
Regarding round duration (the time it takes for the guy to cum), some guys can last longer than others. It’s important not to overly compare yourself to what you see in professionally-produced porno movies, as the male performers may be using special drugs, or the video might be edited to make the round seem longer (perhaps the guy in the porno actually fucked the girl 2 – 3 times, and the editors joined the rounds together with a single cumshot).
On the other hand, we male pornstars are professional fuckers, so there are some things that you can learn by watching us. Just like most everything else in life, it’s a grey area. Healthy Male of Australia states, “most men ejaculate between 5-10 minutes [into sex] and research has shown the average time to ejaculate after penetration is 5 1/2 minutes.“
Round duration becomes more critical depending on what kind of impression you’re trying to leave on the girl. On one side of the spectrum, you might be fucking a girl in a small town on the other side of the world that you’re only passing through for a few hours, never to return. In this case, being a nice guy aside, it doesn’t matter whether or not she gets to cum, or whether or not she thinks you cum too quickly.
On the opposite side of the spectrum, how to fuck a girl for the first time that you desperately want to make your wife will be vastly different. Her pleasure & enjoyment should be of utmost concern to you, as that could make the difference between success and failure. Sex, after all, is the foundational basis for all standard husband/wife and boyfriend/girlfriend relationships. In this case, you’re going to want to increase the foreplay (kissing, caressing, sweet-talking, etc., prior to vaginal penetration) dramatically. You’ll want to become much more in tune with how she’s feeling and what she wants. You’ll probably also want to incorporate some methods to last longer to extend your round duration. I cover a variety of techniques for doing so in my How to Get Laid masterclass.